I Think I'm In Love With You

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

It's been quite some time since I last posted my entry here. Well, apologies to my regular blog visitors, have been rather busy recently at work.

I have no idea why I have so much work to do. Many times, I am always pondering, do I really have so many things on hand to do? What is making my work not being able to finish? Am I that inefficient? Or am I slow? Or I really do have so much work?

After much analyzing, I came to a conclusion that I may be inefficient in doing my work. I realise I need longer time than any other people to do certain things, i.e. write up, designs, etc. I am easily distracted by the slightest things around me. I also realise I am always rather slow in doing some things and get fustrated when people keep pushing me to do things fast. Well, of course I hope I can improve on that and do things at the shortest time, and am trying to improve and tries not to get myself distracted that easily, hence I started not to bother on to much things (which may make myself look/ feel attitude).

Recently my sales hotline number is rather HOT. It doesn't stop ringing even at wee hours, and weekends. Starting was still fine, but don't know why recently i find the calls rather irritating. I don't know if its the call that is making me irritated or the questions that the customer asked makes me feel irritated. Sometimes I just don't understand why the customer likes to ask the same question again and again, even after I have tell them the answer. At time, i have this urge to just tell them, "I thought you have asked the question before and I have told you the answer already, why still ask?" But i think it's rather rude, hence I will say "like I have just said, bla bla bla" and give them a feeling that I am irritated with the repeated questions.

Don't know why this few weeks I can't sleep well at night. It's either I wake up several times in the middle of the night, or I have dreams that link to either work or band. Sometimes, I wake up with the delimma whether what i dream is real or not. It's a kind of dejavu feeling, just like it happens before, or going to happen. One incident is I dream about picking up a phone call and making an appointment for someone to go, but after that when i started to think about it, i can't find any information about it and can't remember the exact location and the person's name and contact number. I also dream going work, meeting client for sales, picking up calls. think i'm going insane already.

Nowadays even when I'm home and I pick up the phone, I will say "Hello, Innotec.". God... I will also have the imagination that the phone is ringing as and when, and will tend to go check my phone, which actually it didn't. Don't know whether is this a phobia to work. but anyway, this is causing me lack of sleep and being very tired in the middle of the day.

Just mention to my boss about myself might not be in the company by end of the year (which he felt that I'm treatening him). Well, I am not threatening la, just that if anyone from the media company who offer to hire me, I'll definitely go since it's my dream and goal to work in a media company. My DJ course will be starting soon, and if I perform well, maybe I'll get a chance to be a DJ? Well, we shall see how things goes, and maybe i will start with being part time DJ first and continue to work with Innotec. Actually i don't have confidence in being a DJ, but of course I hope to have a chance to experience being one.

Anyway, whether or not I am with Innotec or not in future, what I can promise is that I'll still try to help in the marketing work, designing work and all, understanding that maybe I may understand what my young boss expect and want. So no worries that the job is keep undone, or unoccupied. Young boss, really not to threaten you on leaving the company. But I believe you know that sooner or later I will if i can find a better prospect or a job that I have more interest in. But of course i will not disappear overnight and will still help you through on whatever you need to (even if I am not with the company, promised).

love goes around | 12:49 AM